SON-IN-LAW- JAAMAATAA- ( जामाता )

SUBHASHITHAM:172

सदा वक्रस्सदारुष्टः सदा पूजामपेक्षते ।

कन्याराशिस्थितो नित्यं जामाता दशमो ग्रहः ॥

sadā vakrassadāruṣṭaḥ sadā pūjāmapekṣate ।

kanyārāśisthito nityaṃ jāmātā daśamo grahaḥ ॥

Always crooked, always angry, always expecting veneration - established eternally in the 'kanyā-rāśi' the son-in-law is the tenth planet.

जामाता  कृष्णसर्पस्च पावकॊ दुर्जनस्तथा I

विश्वासो नैव कर्तव्यः पञ्चमो भगिनी सुतः II

Jaamaataa krsnasarpascha paavakoo durjanastathaa

Visvaaso naiva kartavyah panchamo bhaginiisutah

Five Untrustworthy: Son in law- Jaamaataa, Cobra – Krsnasarpa, Fire- Agni (Paavaka)

Bad people- Durjana , Sister’s son – Bhaginiisutah

मातुलस्य  बलं  माता जामातुर्दुहिता बलम् |

श्वशुरस्य बलं भार्या स्वयमेवाSतिथेर्बलम्  ||

Maatulasya balam maata jaamaaturduhitaa balam.

Swashurasya balam bhaaryaa swayamevaatitherbalam.

The maternal uncle of a person gets support from his mother, his son-in-law is supported by his daughter, and his father-in-law gets support from his wife, But if he has an occasion to be a guest somewhere,he has to support himself.

 जामाता जठरं जाया जातवेदा जलयाशयः  |

पूरिता नैव   पूर्यन्ते जकाराः पञ्च दुर्लभाः ||

Jaamaataa hjatharam jaayaa jaataveda jalaashayah.

Pooritaa naiva pooryante jakaaraah panch durelabhaah.

A son-in-law,  stomach,  wife , a fire and a lake, even after being well provided ,are never satisfied or fulfilled (and always crave for more ).  All these five 'jakaars' are rare and difficult to contain.

ऋष्यशृङ्गस्तु जामाता पुत्रांस्तव विधास्यति |

सनत्कुमारकथितमेतावद्व्याहृतं मया || १-९-१९Rmayana

"Sage Rishyasringa, son-in-law of Romapaada, King of Anga and as well as to you, if invited to our kingdom he will bless you to beget sons, oh! King... so said Sage Sanatkumaara to other sages and all this is retold by me." [Thus the charioteer and the Minister Sumantra completed his narration in confidence to King Dasharatha.] [1-9-19]

Sage Rishyasringa is also a son-in-law to King Dasharatha. Princess Shanta, in a distant relationship is a daughter to King Dasharatha in relation and the adopted daughter of Romapaada, the King of Anga. Thus Sumantra's saying son-in-law also means Dasharatha's son-in-law, besides Romapada's.

भार्या ज्येष्ठा शिशुः श्यालः श्वश्रूः स्वातन्त्र्यवर्तिनी ।

श्वशुरः तु प्रवासी च जामातुर्भाग्यकारणात् ॥

Bharyaa jyeshtaa shishuh shyalah svahrooh svaatantrya vartinee I

Svasurah tu pravaasee cha jaamaatur bhagyakaaranaat II

Wife is the eldest in her family, brother-in-law is young, mother-in-law lives in complete freedom, father-in-law is abroad, such a happy position is obtained only by lucky son-in-law.

जामातुर्वक्रता तावद्यावद्बालस्य बालता ।

प्रबुध्यमाने सारल्यं प्रबुद्धेऽस्मिन् पलायनम् ॥

Jaamaaturvakrataa taavadyaavad baalasya baalataa I

Prabudyamaane saarlyam prabuddhe asmin palaayanam II

A son-in-law taunts his authority as long as his brother-in-law is young. When brother-in-law grows in stature his behaviour is less demonstrative, once brother-in-law is a man of authority and rich, son-in-law rarely likes to go to his in-law’s place.

 जामातारो भागिनेयाः मातुलाः दारबान्धवाः ।

अज्ञाता एव गृहिणां भक्षयन्त्याखुवद् गृहे ॥

Once a man is rich, then his son-in-law, nephew (sister’s son ), uncles , and wife’s relatives eat his riches without his knowing. Therefore, these relatives are like rats.  

SRI KRISHNAYA THUBHYAM NAMAH

SON-PUTRAH-SUTAH-( पुत्र:-सुतः )

SUBHASHITHAM:171

एकेनापि  सुपुत्रेण विद्यायुक्तेन  साधुना  |

आह्लाlदितं कुलं  सर्वं यथा चन्द्रेण शर्वरी ||  - चाणक्य नीति (३/१६ )

 Ekenaapi suputrena vidyaayuktena saadhunaa.

Aahlaaditam kulam sarvam yathaa chandrena sharvari.

Even a single son endowed with knowledge and

excellent qualities brings joy and recognition to his family

just like the Moon brings cool brightness to the  night.

एकेन शुष्क वृक्षेण दह्यमानेन वह्निना |

दह्यते तद्वनं  सर्वं दुष्पुत्रेण  कुलं यथा   ||

Eken shushka vrukshena dahyamaanena vahninaa,

Dhyate tadvanam sarvam dushputrena kulam yathaa.

Even a single dried up tree in a forest on catching fire results in the burning of the entire forest. Similarly a wicked and prodigal son also brings in disgrace to his family and ultimately results in destruction of the family.

लालयेत् पञ्चवर्षाणि  दशवर्षाणि ताडयेत् ।
प्राप्ते तु षोडशे वर्षे    पुत्रं मित्रवदाचरेत् ॥ —- चाणक्यनीतिः
Lalayet Pancha varshani   Dasha Varshaani Tadayet |
Prapte tu shodashe varshe   Putram mitramvadacharet ||

 A child should be pampered for first five years. He should be disciplined and spanked for next ten years. Once he is sixteen, he should be treated like a friend.

शृण्वन्तु बिश्वे अमृतस्य पुत्रा

आ ये धामानि दिब्यानि तस्थुः II  Shvetashvatara Upanishad,

Shrinwantu Vishwe Amritasya Putra

Aa Ye Dhamani Dibyani Tasthu II

Ye Children Of Immortal Bliss! May those who reign over heavenly regions hear!
(This was extensively quoted by Swami Vivekanandaa in the west )

पुम् नाम्ना नरकाद् यस्मात् पितरम् त्रायते सुतः |

तस्मात् पुत्र इति प्रोक्तः पितृऋन् यत् पाति वा सुतः || Ramayana

"Since a son delivers his father from a place of torment (hell) called 'Put', he is named as 'Putra'- 'he who delivers his ancestors from all dangers'"

जीवतोर् वाक्य  कारणात्, प्रत्याब्दं  भूरि  भोजनात् ,

गयायां  पिण्ड  दानात् ,   त्रिभि:  पुत्रस्य  पुत्रता II        

Jeevator vaakya karanaat,  Pratyaabdam Bhuri bhojanaat, I

Gayayaam pinda daanaat,  tribhi: putrasya putrataâ II

When the parents are alive, obey their commands. When they die, perform their annual sraaddha properly. And go to Gaya and offer pindas for them. You can be called a son to your parents only when you do all these three things.

सुकृतेन कुले जन्म सुकृतेन सुभाषितम् ।

सुकृतेन सती भार्या सुकृतेन कृती सुतः ॥

sukRutena kule janma sukRutena subhAShitam ।

sukRutena satI bhAryA sukRutena kRutI sutaH ॥

It is only by good fortune (as a result of good karma in previous lives) that one gets to be born in a good family, collect good subhashitas, get married to a lady of good character and get a son who will achieve something substantial.

प्रत्यक्षे गुरुवः स्तुत्यः प्रोक्षे मित्र बन्धवः ।

कार्यान्ते दास भृत्यः स्वपुत्रः न कदचन ॥

pratyakShe guruvaH stutyaH prokShe mitra bandhavaH |

kAryAnte dAsa bhRutyaH svaputraH na kadachana ||

Guru should be praised on the face, friends and relatives behind their back; servants after they finish a job, and one’s own sons-—never!

बहुभिर्बत किं जातैः पुत्रैर्धर्मार्थवर्जितैः |

वरमेकः पथि तरुर्यत्र विश्रमते जनः ||

bahubhirbatha kim jAthaihi puthrairDHarmArTHavarjithaihi |

varamEkaha paTHi tharuryathra vishramathE janaha ||

What is the use of raising children who are neither righteous nor prosperous? It is better to grow a tree by the roadside where people can come and rest.

सुजीर्णमन्नं सुविचक्षणः सुतः

सुशासिता स्त्री नृपतिः सुसेवितः ।

सुचिन्त्य चोक्तं सुविचार्य यत्कृतं

सुदीर्घकालेऽपि न याति विक्रियाम्  ॥ १.२२ ॥Panchatantra

sujIrNamannaM suvichakShanaH sutaH

     sushAsitA strI nRupatiH susevitaH ।

suchintya choktam suvichArya yatkRutam

    sudIrghakAle na hi yAti vikriyAm ॥

The following are of great value and their value does not erode over time: well digested food, well brought up son, well cultured woman, well served king, well thought speech, well deliberated action.

एकेनापि सुपुत्रेण सिंही स्वपिति निर्भयम् ।

सहैव दशभिः पुत्रैर्भारं वहति गर्दभी ॥

A lioness has only one son - a good son. So, she can sleep fearlessly. A donkey on the other hand has ten children. But she has to still slog it out by lifting weights.

यस्य न विपदि विषादः संपदि हर्षो रणे न भीरुत्वम् ।

तं भुवनत्रयतिलकं जनयति जननी सुतं विरलम् ॥

It is very rare that a mother gives birth to a son, worthy of praise  in all the three worlds , who is not perturbed  when faced with trouble, not overly joyous when prosperous and not a coward in battlefield.

एष्टव्या बहवः पुत्रा गुणवन्तो बहु श्रुताः |

तेषाम् वै समवेतानाम् अपि कश्चिद् गयाम् व्रजेत् || Ramayana

"To have many virtuous and learned sons is to be desired, since one, at least among them, who is intimately connected will come to Gaya to perform a sacrifice."
SRI KRISHNAYA THUBHYAM NAMAH

FATHER-PITAA-(पिता)

SUBHASHITHANI:170

जनिता चोपनेता च यस्तु विद्यां प्रयच्छति।

अन्नदाता भयत्राता पञ्चैता पितरः स्मृताः॥ Chanakya neeti

Janita cha upaniita cha yastu vidyaam prayacchati

Annadataa bhayatraataa panchaite pitarah smrutaaha

. Your own father, the person who takes you to a Guru (one who initiates), the one who gives you education (teacher), one who gives you food and one who saves you from danger are to be respected as father. 

व्यसनेषु मनुष्याणां भृशं भवति दुःखितः।।

उत्सवेषु च सर्वेषु पितेव परितुष्यति।Ramayana

Vyasaneshu  manushyaanaam brusham bhavati dukhitah I

Utsaveshu cha sarveshu piteva paritushyati II

He grieves profoundly whenever people are afflicted by misfortunes (and) rejoices like a father on festive occasions. ( People of Ayodhya on Rama )

न हि अतः धर्म चरणम् किंचित् अस्ति महत्तरम् |

यथा पितरि शुश्रूषा तस्य वा वचन क्रिया || Ramayana

Na hi atah dharama charanam kinchit asti mahattaram I

Yataa pitari shurooshaa tasya vaa vachana kriyaa II

"There is not indeed anything of greater performance of duty than doing service to father or than doing what he commands."

सत्यश्चाद्य प्रवादोऽयं लौकिकः प्रतिभाति मा ।

पितृन् समनुजायन्ते नरा मातारमङ्गनाः ॥

satyaH cha adya pravAdaH ayam laukikaH pratibhAti maa ।

pitRun sama anujAyante narA mAtAram anganAH ॥

It is not seeming to be true what people say - Sons will inherit the qualities of the father and daughters that of the mother. (As told by Sumantra to Kaikeyi)

त्वया मया च वैदेह्या लक्ष्मणेन सुमित्रया |

पितुर्नियोगे स्थातव्यमेष धर्मः सनातनः || 

"You and I, Sita, Lakshmana, Sumintra and all of us should follow father's directions. This is an eternal custom."

माता गुरुतरा भूमेः खात् पितोच्चतरस्तथा ।

मनः शीघ्रतरं वाताच्चिंता बहुतरी तृणात् ॥- Mahabharata, Vana

mAtA gurutarA bhUmeH khaat pita uccataraH tathA ।

manaH shIghrataram vAtAH chintA bahutarI tRuNAt ॥

Mother's weight (importance) is more than that of the earth. Father's place should be held higher than the sky. Mind moves faster than wind. Worries outnumber the blades of grass.
यं मातापितरौ क्लेशं सहेते संभवे नृणाम् ।

न तस्य निष्कृतिः शक्या कर्तुं वर्षशतैरपि ॥- मनुस्मृति

One must never forget the pains that parents take to bring us to this world. One can not repay the debt even by working for a hundred years.

ऋणकर्ता पिता शत्रुः माता च व्यभिचारिणी।

भार्या रूपवती शत्रुः पुत्रः शत्रुरपण्डितः।। panchatantra

RiNa-kartA pitA shatrur_mAtA cha vyabhichAriNI |

bhAryA rUpavatI shatruH, putraH shatrur_apaNDitaH ||

A father who contracts debts ,a mother gone astray, a very beautiful wife, and a stupid son; all these are like enemies

स्वभावेन हि तुष्यन्ति देवाः सत्पुरुषाः पिताः।

ज्ञातयः स्नानपानाभ्यां वाक्यदानेन पण्डिताः।।

Gods, noble persons,and father are all pleased by one’s behaviour; other kith and kin by enjoying food and drink and scholars by good words.

येनास्य पितरो याता येन याता पितामहाः ।

तेन यायात्सतां मार्गं तेन गच्छन् न रिष्यते ॥- मनुस्मृति

yenAsya pitaro yAtA yena yAtA pitAmahAH।

tena yAyAtsatAM mArgaM tena gacchan na riShyate ॥

If one follows the footsteps of their fathers and forefathers then there will be no fear of straying from the path of Dharma - moral code of conduct.

पितेव पुत्रस्य सखेव सख्यु:

प्रिय: प्रियायार्हसि देव सोढुम् ||BG-CH11. 44||

piteva putrasya sakheva sakhyuḥ

priyaḥ priyāyārhasi deva soḍhum

As a father tolerates his son, a friend forgives his friend, and a lover pardons the beloved, please forgive me for my offences.

SRI KRISHNAYA THUBHYAM NAMAH

HUSBAND-BHARTAA-PATI -(भर्ता,पति)

SUBHASHITHANI;169

संतुष्टो भार्यया भर्ता भार्या भर्त्रा तथैव च ।

 यस्मिन्नेव कुले नित्यं कल्याणं तत्र वै ध्रुवं ॥- मनुस्मृति

Santushto bhaaryayaa bhartaa bhaaryaa bhartraa tataivacha I

Yasminneva kule nithyam kalyaanam vai dhruvam II

Those clans will  definitely prosper and be full of joy where the husbands are content with their wives and the wives are content with their husbands.

नातन्त्री वाद्यते वीणा नाचक्रो वर्तते रथः।

नापतिस्सुखमेधेत या स्यादपि शतात्मजा।।Ramayana

Naa tantree vadhyate veenaa naachakro vartate rathah I

Naa patis sukhamedeta yaa syadapi shataatmajaa II

A veena (lute) sans strings cannot be played. A chariot without wheels cannot move. Similarly, a woman without her husband finds no happiness even though she has one hundred sons.

मितं ददाति हि पिता मितं माता मितं सुतः।

अमितस्य हि दातारं भर्तारं का न पूजयेत्।। Ramayana

Mitam dadaati hi pitaa mitam maataa mitam sutah I

Amitasya hi daataaram bhartaaram kaa na pujayate II

 While the happiness that the father, mother and son give is limited, a husband gives unlimited happiness. Which wife will not worship such a husband?

पतिहीना तु या नारी न सा शक्ष्यति जीवितुम्।

काममेवं विधं राम त्वया मम निदर्शितम्।।Ramayana

Patiheenaa tu yaa naari na saa shakshyati jeevitum I

Kaamamevam vidham Rama tvayaa mama nidarshitam  II

Your salutary instruction to me, O Rama, is 'A woman cannot live without her husband'. This truth is greatly applicable to me. ( Sita's arguments to accompany Rama to the forest )

न पिता नात्मजो नात्मा न माता न सखीजनः।

इह प्रेत्य च नारीणां पतिरेको गतिस्सदा।।Ramayana

Na pitaa naatmajo naatmaa na maataa na sakhee janah I

Iha pretya cha naareenaam patireko gati’s sadaa II

It is not her father or mother, nor her son or herself, nor her friends but her husband alone gives a woman the permanent refuge in this or in the next world.

राजा राष्ट्रकृतं पापं राज्ञः पापं पुरोहितः ।

भर्ता च स्त्रीकृतं पापं शिष्यपापं गुरुः तथा ॥Chanakya

A king is culpable for sins committed by the nation. The adviser to the king is culpable of sins committed by the king. Husband is responsible for his wife's sins. A teacher is responsible for the sins of the pupil.

पिता रक्षति कौमारे भर्ता रक्षति यौवने ।

पुत्रो रक्षति वार्धक्ये न स्त्री स्वातन्त्र्यमर्हति ॥Manu smruti

Pitaa rakshati kaumaare bhartaa rakshati yauvane I

Putro rakshati vaardakye na stree svaatantrayam arhati II
In childhood, a woman is protected by her father, by her husband in her youth and by her sons in her old age. A woman should never be left alone to fend for herself.

भर्तुः शुश्रूषया नारी लभते स्वर्गमु त्तमम् || Ramayana

अपि या निर्नमस्कारा निवृत्ता देवपूजनात् |

Even if a woman does not offer salutation to celestials and does not worship the gods, she will attain the highest heaven by service to her husband ."
தெய்வம் தொழாஅள் கொழுநன் தொழுதெழுவாள்
பெய்யெனப் பெய்யும் மழை.Kural:55
If she, who does not worship God, but who rising worships her husband,  the rain falls instant at her word!.

प्रसादो निष्फलो यस्य क्रोधश्चापि निरर्थकः |

न तं भर्तारमिच्छन्ति षण्डं पतिमिव स्त्रियः || Vidura neeti

A person is to be considered useless if his being pleased does not help you, or his wrath is not potent enough. He is as useless as an impotent husband for a wife. No one will want to serve such a master.

मातु पिता भ्राता हितकारी।

मितप्रद सब सुनु राजकुमारी॥

अमित दानि भर्ता बयदेही।

अधम सो नारि जो सेव न तेही॥3॥Ramcharit manas- Anasooyaa to Sita

Listen, O Princess: a mother, father and brother are all kind to us; but they bestow only limited joy. A husband, however, bestows unlimited joy (in the shape of blessedness), O Janaka's daughter; vile is the woman who refuses to serve him.॥

पर्जन्यनाथाः पशवो राजानो मन्त्रिबान्धवाः ।

पतयो बान्धवाः स्त्रीणां ब्राह्मणा वेदबान्धवाः ॥ ॥Vidura neeti

Rain sustains plants, king is supported by the ministers, husbands support their wives, the scholars protect the vedas.

SRI KRISHNAYA THUBHYAM NAMAH